Kaleidoscope of Color
An Autobiography written by
Amy C. Wheeler
The original entry as it appeared in my notebook in 2019. The colored doodles inside my hand print were created first, followed by the small poems capturing the emotions each color evoked in me while I was drawing.
First Draft of the poems that eventually became the stanzas of the larger poem entitled, Kaleidoscope of Color; an Autobiography.
Colors have always been important to me. Often, I dream in vivid color. My imagination plays with colors constantly, I’m drawn to different colors to match my emotions and mood. Sometimes I even see an aura of color around people or animals; particularly when expressing strong emotion. Numbers and shapes can emit color to me, as well.
Color also appears in much of my poetry; with the nuances of hue and shade becoming a playground for the different facets of myself. The spectrum of the rainbow is such a rich metaphor for self and is a vivid representation of our authentic lives; sometimes in direct contrast to the black and white version of our selves we tend to filter for others.
After I completed this doodle in my notebook, I realized that it was an apt representation of some of the most important aspects of my self and the things I was focusing on and struggling with at the time; which is nearly two years ago, now. In many ways, it remains an accurate array of the span of my emotions and feelings.
Sometimes I wish that I created the piece on a quality piece of unlined paper so that the images could be more crisp, but somehow the fact that it was a spontaneous creation made in one afternoon while sitting in the sun on the back deck feels ok. The whole piece was process heavy; and began as a simple retracing of lines as a way to settle my nerves; which is an outlet for anxiety. It then turned into a visual map of sorts with the patterns evoking finger prints and lines on my palm. It didn’t take long for me to cycle through many feelings as I filled in my hand print and that was a natural lead in to the words that fell out in poems; which I took care to intentionally write in a mirror to the location of the color on the hand print. Alliteration played a central role in creating a personality for each color that matched the element of my own identity that stirs inside myself when I see the color.
I dream of creating larger images of each poem paired with its colored portion of the doodle that are framed. I think it would make a fantastic display where the viewer can walk along a horizontal path to take in each piece. I also think there might be room for more nuanced color names to be added to the collection like burnt umber or red ocher and cornflower blue, chartreuse or indigo. Perhaps even tracing the outline of my body to continue the doodle. I’d love to have a gallery space pick up this idea and be able to create a show as a way to bring the full spectrum of myself in color to others.
If this blog post resonated with you and you’d like to share your favorite color with me or tell me how color impacts your life, please visit me over on Instagram and send me a DM or reach out through the e-mail found in the contact section of this site.
